HIV tests are more positive than that guy
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
