My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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