I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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