That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
i need some magic done to my vagina
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
