Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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