he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
