so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
