Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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