not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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