Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
