Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.

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(646): View more from New York

I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing

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(443): View more from Maryland

I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"

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(907): View more from Alaska

I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess

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(512): View more from Texas

Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.

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(863): View more from Florida

not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.

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