Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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