u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
