sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
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Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
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No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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