It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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