So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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