I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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