I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
