are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
