is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize