Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Randomize
