my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
