fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize