Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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