Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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