the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
