She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
In America we eat man semen.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
