This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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