Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

My friends, they love my intelligence

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.

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(909): View more from California

I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?

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(315): View more from New York

i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.

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(310): View more from California

Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend

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(425): View more from Washington

She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.

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(714): View more from California

Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?

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