ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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