definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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