Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
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her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
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I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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