Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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