I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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