dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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