Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
