Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
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I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
May the power of my ass compel you!!
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My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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