WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize