So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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