what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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