i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
