dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I think my vagina is haunted
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
