Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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