Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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