i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize