just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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