The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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