two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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