Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
