Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize