his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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